Friday, June 19, 2015
Spitball: Avengers Blue Team
Just as Tony Stark says "We've got a Hulk", and everyone oohs and ahhs, Barack says "We've got a John Kerry." Witness the massive property loss, the devestation wrought. And instead of a Black Widow/Scary Jo, they got Ruth Bader Ginsberg, who is intimidating enough to Middle America. Iron Man with Margaret Sanger tracts in his back pocket, if that darned suit even has a back pocket. It should, but as Kyle Reese said "I didn't build the f**king thing!". It's like having a pack of serpents watching your back. Who would direct such madness? Favreau? Nah. The man who brought us House of the Dead and the semi-static rotating camera trick. Because crap like this takes vision. A hell of a vision. Imagination. The kind of faith in the face of back-breaking reality that only liberals can muster. And they ask why we aren't winning in Iraq, but we're reminded that we're not even in Iraq. I say bring on the Kurdish might, get those factions united and behind a common goal, kick some booty. How about issues of Captain America where Cap is training soldiers rather than fighting? What is that shield for anyway? An umbrella to block the sun while he is drinking his iced tea after a long day of training those defense forces. For this fictional film, I give a ranking of 5.5 of 10 stars.